Updates or boredom ..
So .. I am bored to death right now.
It's past 8 pm, on a Wednesday night, and alone in the lab, listening to Atomic Mind by that genius kid from Toronto.
I feel disconnected from reality for some off reason. I am not sure why.. I have been pouring over my Corel files and working through them.. I took breaks yesterday and the day before to update my academic CV, and write a decent statement of my teaching philosophy...
Oh, I even started a post here about my teaching ... so as to help me sift through the many facets to my brief stint last year...
I emailed with PP and he emailed me back a masterful piece of literature by AA Gill... Jeez! some people have mastered both writing and sarcasm ..
Anyways, my head is in the clouds for some reason or another ... I can't recall where I stopped with my writing, neither for the paper nor my thesis ... scary I know ...
I haven't been reading my nightly book on research, which I should really pick up tomorrow (provided that I still have motivation after tomorrow) ... I actually should (Husky should be getting back to successful candidates, and I don't think I will be making the list, which is kinda depressing)...
Anyways, positive thoughts seem to escape and my back hurts from sitting here all day ...
I am scared of working out ... and that's really not a good feeling ...
And I feel lonely ...
I feel so lonely it hurts ...
Its easier to feel this way when I am not alone ... BH is usually working over there and I am on my workstation and I am not so wrapped up in my thoughts ... Its terrible ...
I am thinking about going home ... but I looked at the date counter earlier, and April 30 is 185 days away ... that's six months and three days approximately ...
I have no clear plan on what will happen ...
Now, at least that's mature thinking ... this morning, all I could think of was how ugly I feel!! Yes, seriously!! I couldn't stop obsessing about how ugly I am and how I should just disappear or something LOL
Anyways, I need a break .. and I need food for sure .. the house is empty of food or semi-empty ... who cares really :)
I feel better now .. now I will go back to work on my thesis
It's past 8 pm, on a Wednesday night, and alone in the lab, listening to Atomic Mind by that genius kid from Toronto.
I feel disconnected from reality for some off reason. I am not sure why.. I have been pouring over my Corel files and working through them.. I took breaks yesterday and the day before to update my academic CV, and write a decent statement of my teaching philosophy...
Oh, I even started a post here about my teaching ... so as to help me sift through the many facets to my brief stint last year...
I emailed with PP and he emailed me back a masterful piece of literature by AA Gill... Jeez! some people have mastered both writing and sarcasm ..
Anyways, my head is in the clouds for some reason or another ... I can't recall where I stopped with my writing, neither for the paper nor my thesis ... scary I know ...
I haven't been reading my nightly book on research, which I should really pick up tomorrow (provided that I still have motivation after tomorrow) ... I actually should (Husky should be getting back to successful candidates, and I don't think I will be making the list, which is kinda depressing)...
Anyways, positive thoughts seem to escape and my back hurts from sitting here all day ...
I am scared of working out ... and that's really not a good feeling ...
And I feel lonely ...
I feel so lonely it hurts ...
Its easier to feel this way when I am not alone ... BH is usually working over there and I am on my workstation and I am not so wrapped up in my thoughts ... Its terrible ...
I am thinking about going home ... but I looked at the date counter earlier, and April 30 is 185 days away ... that's six months and three days approximately ...
I have no clear plan on what will happen ...
Now, at least that's mature thinking ... this morning, all I could think of was how ugly I feel!! Yes, seriously!! I couldn't stop obsessing about how ugly I am and how I should just disappear or something LOL
Anyways, I need a break .. and I need food for sure .. the house is empty of food or semi-empty ... who cares really :)
I feel better now .. now I will go back to work on my thesis
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